Thursday, September 08, 2005

Farkin' Links Vol. 143 9/8

I finally picked up my car last night...I use the word finally because I had to sit around for several hours while they were getting it ready. It's sort of like when your plane gets delayed because they're having a problem with the "intercom" even though you see the techs furiously working on the wing or engines. With all this free time of hand sitting, I got to watch the finale to this reality show called "The Cut." The premise was a collection of weirdos...I mean designers who were competing for a job designing clothes at Tommy Hilfiger. The best part about the show was that I found out there really was a Tommy Hilfiger. I thought he was one of those made up guys like J. Peterman from Seinfeld. All I can say about the final clothes designs from the three finalists is that I wouldn't use them unless I was wiping off my new car.

Besides the excitement of reality tv, this really hot chick and her handler came in to the dealership and attempted to purchase a Miata...or an MX5 as it's now called. I guess numbers and letter designations sound cooler; I know it worked for Star Wars. Anyways, she wasn't exactly beautiful, she looked like she had about as much milage as my old Civic and she walked with the confidence of a woman who knows she can get whatever she wanted, so my mind instantly decided STRIPPER! On a side note, the Miata she took for a spin has one of those keyless entry units; you just have the electronic unit with you and the car unlocks and starts up by itself. Very futuristic and cool...until you loose it in the laundry and have to pay 6 grand to get a new one. Anyways, the chick ended up leaving in a bit of a huff, so I wandered over to the manager of the store where they were talking about the whole incident.

"What was that about?," I asked.
"We couldn't do the sale. She had no verifiable evidence of income, and she wanted a specific payment that we just couldn't do."
"Un-verifiable?"
"Yeah...she's a dancer."
"You mean exotic, hanging off a pole type dancer, right?"
"Hehe...yeah, exactly."
"I thought she looked familiar."

On a brighter note, she can probably walk back in that place in about 2 weeks and buy the damn thing with cash, if she doesn't snort all of her lap dance tips up her nose.

"Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book."
--Ronald Reagan


Hahaha...this guy is a regular riot. They'll love him in prison.

Hi, my name is Sam and I'm here to rob you.

What's cooler than watching a bullfight? If you answered watching a midget bullfight, you get a cigar.

Here's the top 10 funny and 10 offensive religious jokes. Enjoy.

This guy went through a lot of trouble to check out childhood starlets to see if they're hot now. I, for one, applaud his efforts.

...and now for a Lindsey Lohan update. This guy thinks she's starting to look healthier...I'm not so sure.

Here's a rather amusing soccer story that even people not named Moody can enjoy. I'd say this is pretty gay, but Vinnie Jones would probably hunt me down and kill me...or at the least re-enact this picture.

I guess Jerome Bettis is trying to establish a new career after football...although he's no Doc Love at this point.

Damn! Where did she go!? Ninjas are too powerful!

Hehe...o.k., this REALLY looks like something someone from Cal Tech would invent. I mean, their mascot is the beaver, right Ben? Not safe for work.

Wow...how come my teachers never looked like this? I guess I should have grown up in Italy.

I knew it wasn't the president, or the Federal government, or the incompetent local government that was responsible for Katrina. IT WAS THE COMMIES!

Do you feel as though you've been wronged and the offending party just won't apologize? You should go to this link.

This is the stupidest invention I've ever seen...I'll buy three.

Who says you never learn anything useful on TV?

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