Farkin' Links Vol. 187

What a nice Monday morning it is. It's overcast and somewhat chilly; normally that would be a crappy day. But after the 100 degree heat this past month, I'm looking forward to the Autumn chill.

I've haven't sent one of these out for a couple of days, and you can blame that on Jack Bauer. My dad was raving about how fun that show 24 is and he lent me seasons 2 and 3. I actually watched season 1, but wasn't all that impressed. I should have stayed on board, because season 2 was one hell of a roller coaster ride. I should take my dad's advice on television shows more often, especially with the amount of tv he takes in. Oh, sure, he once tried to claim he doesn't really watch that many shows and started ticking them off on his fingers...he soon ran out of fingers and thumbs. To be fair, he does watch all the CSI and Law and Order shows, so that's, what, 22 shows right there...give or take a CSI: Omaha or whatever their umpteenth version is. Still, there really hadn't been any good torture shows until 24 came around. It's implausable as hell, but you won't be able to turn it off. I sat through 8 episodes straight this past weekend.

Oh yeah, we also won our basketball game...sort of. The other team didn't show up and forfeited. So technically, we went 1-6 in the regular season, then 3-0 in the playoffs. That's clutch, baby.

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.
-George Bernard Shaw


So, Abe, are these the type of ladies you're looking for over there in Israel? You better not be the Jerusalem Gigolo, because they look like they can shoot pretty straight.

USA Today apologizes for photoshopping demon eyes on Condi Rice. I dunno...she looks somewhat scarier without the change. I can't see why people are scared that she might run for president; there's no way Americans are going to elect the first black, the first female, and the first lesbian all in one try.

Speaking of politics and photoshopping, it looks as though Reuters has been caught photoshopping extra smoke and destruction in pictures of Beirut...because, you know, the actual smoke and destruction just isn't exciting enough, I guess.

Enough with all the stupid politics...on to far more important features, like how to open a beer with a piece of paper. Macgyver would be proud. Strangely, this man has a box of bounce on his kitchen counter; either he does his laundry in his dish washer or he puts his weed in there.

I missed out on this years ago; the hundred greatest novels of all time...also known as the 100 books you may have been assigned to read in class which you wisely bought the cliff notes and watched Beverly Hills 90210 and Saved by the Bell instead.

I know the great Wesley Snipes told us to "Always bet on black," but maybe not when they're outweighed by 100 pounds. That's just...ow...

I'm sorry I have to do this to you, but keep this in mind in case anybody suggests to you that you should watch some figure skating because it's really graceful...

Huh...well, that's...um...rather suggestive. You know, that Donald Duck doesn't wear pants...

Nice...a compilation of people getting knocked the f*ck out! This is what UFC should be, instead of the homo-erotic foreplay of men wearing speedos lying on each other.

In case you were wondering why Jessica Simpson is still so popular for not having really done much of anything other than acting in commercials with Muppets...well, there's two very good reasons. Might not be safe for work.