Wow...Phoebe Cates' story in Gremlins was true after all!

I think this happened to Goofy in a Disney cartoon once...unfortunately, this guy wasn't a cartoon.

I got a name for this class. It's called, quit going to McDonald's.

Hehe...I sure hope this club is on the ground floor...speaking of which, what the hell is a "vivacious plus-size woman?"

I think Jesus would have offered wine instead, but it is a bunch of Aussies.

Yeah...I agree with the Prince. If they wanted to be special, they should have been born into the Royal family, dammit!

Damn the NBA! Why are they bringin' down Mark Cuban for? If you want to fine him for something, fine him for that hairdo!

Sure, it sounds cool, but if you cut your finger, just stick to the bandaids.

I guess you really can sue over anything.

...and they say people don't have fun in Texas. Well, apparently they don't.

Even in death he's a bastard. That's probably why my computer is running so slow today.

Wow...that R. Kelly is in more films than Paris Hilton. I wonder if he was practicing "water sports" in this one as well.

Wow...this guy is so going to hell. Read the last part of the sale.

Well, they better send him to Big Gay Al's place.

I can understand playing football, hell even golf on an Xbox...but yoga? That's like making a videogame where you go to the gym and lift weights.

Hello...Is it me you're looking for? Because I wonder where you are...oh, you're in jail? How the hell did that happen?

Poor R. Kelly...still getting mocked. What did he ever do to deserve this? Oh, right...that.

Oh sure...you have the old lady strip down to look for weapons and contraband, but you let a DEER into the airport? What...he had proper identification on him?

I hope this doesn't give Germany any bright ideas regarding Auschwitz...

You know...that's not a bad idea for politicians. I know I'd take notice if strippers were handing out election material.

Take this to the next woman that complains about her butt being big. Maybe Sir-Mix-A-Lot really was on to something.

Oh yeah...and in case you were ever wondering what all those rappers real names were(don't pretend, you know you want to know), here is a helpful list.